The Amazing Link Between Sleep and Memory

Napping is a guilty pleasure... one all of us, if we’re lucky, engage in at one time or another, especially during the cold, dark months of winter.

And it seems interestingly that new research has found the link between sleep and memory and that short naps help actually improve to our creativity and our ability to see the big picture.

Too many of us, in our got-to-be-everywhere, 24/7 world, try to act like sleep is something we can do without. But we can’t.

Enter the power nap... a short 15 to 20 minute rest period outside our normal nightly routine, just enough to get us through.

Sleep depravation is a major problem that’s a factor behind many types of accidents, not the least of which happen when driving.

Surveys show that most adults don’t get the seven to eight hours recommended each night to recharge, rebuild and remember.

Over time, lack of sleep can seriously impact the body, leaving you open to diabetes, heart disease and other dangerous conditions.

You only have to think about when you have been ill, and restorative nature of sleep, and how you wake feeling better.

In fact, sleep is as important as a healthy, balanced diet and regular exercise keeping the body strong and healthy.

“Not only do we need to remember to sleep, but most certainly we sleep to remember,” says Dr. William Fishbein, a cognitive neuroscientist at the City University of New York, one of our nation’s leading urban public universities. Dr. Fishbein presented the sleep and memory research last week In Washington D.C. at the annual meeting of the Society for Neuroscience.

As a natural part of aging our sleep becomes more fragmented, we wake more often during the night. Serious conditions like sleep apnea, where breathing stops for short periods so that you are jolted wake, make getting a good night’s sleep impossible.

But fragmented sleep impacts us effects us for days as well. Research on both animals and human subjects shows that we continue to struggle for weeks, even after our sleeping patterns return to normal.

The most recent research on sleep has focused less on the duration of your sleeping period and more on the quality of the sleep, termed sleep intensity.

This period of very deep sleep, known as slow wave sleep (not as well known as dreaming REM sleep) comes first, helping the brain process memories so they stay put. Dr. Fishbein had suspected a bigger role for slow wave sleep periods... perhaps the reason power naps leave us so refreshed.

In the research, 20 English-speaking college students were shown lists of Chinese words of two characters - mother, sister, maid. Then half the students took a nap, and were closely monitored to be sure they didn’t go from slow wave sleep to the REM (dreaming) stage.

When they woke, they took a multiple-choice test of Chinese words they’d never seen. Subjects who napped (an unheard of 90 minute nap) did much better at automatically learning that the first of the two-pair characters in the words they’d memorized earlier always meant the same thing - female. This group, more than the non-nappers were more likely to choose a new word with characters that meant “princess” not “ape.”

“The nap group has essentially teased out what’s going on,” Fishbein concludes.

Another study used a different approach to prove the importance of slow wave sleep on memory.

Researchers from the University of Wisconsin interrupted subjects’ slow wave sleep with a beep that was just loud enough to disturb sleep, but not fully rouse the subject.

Upon waking those people who’d been beeped couldn’t remember a task they’d learned the day before as well as subjects whose slow-wave sleep hadn’t been disrupted by the tone.

The “take to bed” message is this.

If you suspect sleep apnea, get yourself treated. Just as you eat well and exercise to keep your body (and mind) healthy, do all you can to foster good sleep habits so your body, mind and memory get the chance to recharge.

Regularly depriving yourself of sleep... and then playing catch up on the weekend is sleep’s version of binge eating - not healthy for the long haul.

As for all you nappers out there... take heart; the sum of all this latest sleep research stands in support of those sleep and memory, and that power naps leave you recharged and ready to go. -Kirsten Whittaker

Sleeping in a dark room may prevent depression

Do you fall asleep while reading, with a lamp still turned on? Doze off with the glow of a television in your bedroom? Perhaps you turn off the lights when you go to bed. But think about it: is your room really totally dark? Maybe there's a light from a clock radio or night light or perhaps street lights peek through the bedroom blinds. This not-completely-dark room might not keep you awake but it could lead to symptoms of depression. That's the conclusion of a new study presented recently in Chicago at the annual meeting of the Society for Neuroscience and slated for publication in the December 28, 2009, issue of the journal Behavioural Brain Research.

The Ohio State University research involved 24 male laboratory mice. Half were housed in light for 16 hours a day and darkness for 8 hours, while the others lived in a lighted area 24 hours a day. Half of each group of lab animals had opaque tubes in their cages where they could escape the light at any time. The other half had tubes that were clear and did not offer any respite from the light.

After three weeks, the researchers used a series of tests to measure depression and anxiety in the rodents (including several tests used by drug companies to test anti-depressive and anti-anxiety drugs on animals before they are tried on people). For example, mice usually like to drink sugar-laced water. But if they have symptoms of depression, they don't drink as much. Researchers assume this is because they don't get the pleasure they would normally get from the sweet water due to depressive symptoms. In all the tests, the mice who had to live and sleep in constant light with no chance of spending time in darkness showed more depressive-like symptoms than the animals with normal light-dark cycles.

"The ability to escape light seemed to quell the depressive effects," Laura Fonken, lead author of the study and a graduate student in psychology at Ohio State University, said in a statement to the media. "But constant light with no chance of escape increased depressive symptoms."

The scientists concluded that the use of artificial light at night may have harmful effects on human health. "This is important for people who work night shifts, and for children and others who watch TV late into the night, disrupting their usual light-dark cycle," Fonken said. -naturalnews

Herbs to Help Stop Smoking

There are several herbs with a traditional reputation for helping people quit smoking. These herbs exert varying effects that will ease the process of smoking cessation. Most of them can be found in either dried bulk, capsule, or liquid extract form. Follow the directions on the label for use. If using dried herbs, use them only to prepare tea, and never smoke them as a replacement for tobacco.

Lobelia (pictured above): Is a very powerful herb that helps to calm the mind and relax the body. It has helped many people to control their cravings for nicotine. Lobelia is also reputed to have the effect of making cigarettes taste very bad.

St. John’s wort: One of the best known herbs for promoting a positive mental attitude–something people often need help with during the early phases of becoming a non-smoker.

Black cohosh: Is commonly used by women to help them stay balanced during their monthly cycle. However, it is also known to be a safe sedative that relieves nervousness and anxiety, which makes it useful for the irritability, restlessness, and nervousness associated with quitting smoking.

Blue vervain: Has been referred to as a natural tranquilizer and as such it can be used to calm the nerves. It can also be used for insomnia.

Catnip: Has a soothing and relaxing effect on the digestive system, and helps to relieve diarrhea, flatulence, indigestion, upset stomach, and headache. Catnip also has antispasmodic properties that make it useful for abdominal cramps as well as chronic coughing. Catnip is also good for alleviating sleeplessness. Catnip’s antibiotic and astringent properties are also beneficial for treating colds and bronchial infections.

Hyssop: Has the ability to help with clearing mucus congestion in the lungs associated with COPD. It also has been known to alleviate the anxiety and even hysteria that is sometimes associated with smoking withdrawal.

Korean ginseng: Is one of the most popular herbs in the world for stimulating energy and helping the body to deal with stress. This property enables ginseng to help alleviate the fatigue and anxiety related to quitting smoking. Ginseng is known to help reestablish balance in the body’s systems, which can be helpful to smokers as their bodies adjust to the absence of nicotine.

Motherwort: Has properties that enable it to act as a sedative, inducing tranquility in times of anxiety associated with quitting smoking.

Oat straw or oat seed: One of the best remedies for stress, nervous debility, and exhaustion, especially when associated with depression (a common affliction in people who have recently quit smoking).

Peppermint: Has a relaxing effect on the muscles of the digestive system, combats flatulence, and stimulates the flow of bile and other digestive juices. The volatile oil in peppermint acts as a mild anesthetic to the stomach wall, which helps alleviate feelings of nausea. Where headaches are associated with digestion, peppermint may help. Peppermint also eases anxiety and tension.

Skullcap: Contains plant compounds that help the brain produce more endorphins (naturally occurring chemicals that promote feelings of well-being). This is believed to enhance both awareness and calmness. Skullcap relaxes states of nervous tension while renewing and reviving the central nervous system.

Slippery elm: Is rich in nutrients and easy to digest, making it an excellent food during times of digestive discomfort, which can sometimes accompany smoking cessation. It works with the body to draw out impurities and toxins, assisting with the healing of the entire body.

Valerian: One of the premier sedative herbs used to aid people with anxiety, stress, and insomnia. Valerian also acts as a muscle relaxant. Valerian is clearly one of the herbs of choice in smoking cessation to deal with the issues of insomnia, restlessness, and anxiety. -Annie B. Bond/care2

Learning To Love Your Soul

Having a healthy body and a healthy mind is really good for you. But what good can those two be when deep down you’re a mess? How can you have a healthy soul? Your soul is your centre of being; it is your every essence, if you will. So nurture it and learn to love it.

Find inner peace and solitude. Every morning, try to get some time for you to spend on your own. You could exercise, have coffee while watching the neighborhood wake up, go for a jog or a walk, or just meditate. Having time for yourself is a great way to center yourself and find your being. Once you at peace with yourself, you are ready to face the world.

Fill your day with the positive vibe. One easy yet great way to do this is to surround yourself with positive people. Positivity and enthusiasm are infectious. So if you surround yourself with such people, you will be positive too. Nurture our relationships with positive friends and share all your aspirations. Having this type of relationship is a great way to build yourself up, inside and out.

Show how much you care and empathize with others. Did you know that a small act of kindness can do wonders for the other person? Not only will that other person feel great, you too will feel great! So go on, show how much you care and appreciate that special someone!

Listen. Yes, we go on with our daily routine without having the time to listen. We hear things, but we rarely take the time to listen. So go ahead, listen to the radio or classical music or whatever you like because music soothes the soul. It is actually therapeutic to just sit and listen, even if you’re just listening to the rain on your roof or the waves rolling at the beach. Close your eyes, take deep breaths, and just enjoy the moment. You will immediately feel at ease.

These simple suggestions can help you find your inner peace and can help to nurture your soul. When you feel good inside, it will show on the outside. Thus, nurture your soul and lead a happy and healthy life. You deserve it! -Tom Mckenna

It’s Hard to Be Happy!

One unforgettable day in New York City, over ten years ago, I was crossing Park Avenue on my way to give a lecture when a Yellow Cab that had decided not to stop at a red light careened out of control at about forty miles an hour. It sideswiped me and my wife, shortly after we had stepped off the curb, before hitting a few other people and crashing into another car. I can clearly see the picture in my mind’s eye even now. I was standing in the street, my right arm badly broken, dangling as if by a thread, and my right calf so deeply ripped open that later I was told that my shin bone was clearly visible. My wife lay unconscious at my feet with blood trickling from the corner of her mouth. In that instant, I thought she might be dead. Hours later, in my hospital bed, having received the news that she and I would recover and be more or less as good as new within a year, I remember witnessing the thought, “How could this happen to me?” arising in my awareness. And then the answer came, “Why shouldn’t it?”

For some time now I have been reflecting upon the bizarre irony of the fact that so many of us at the leading edge of Western culture–the wealthiest, most highly educated, and privileged generation ever to exist on the face of the earth–have somehow gotten the idea in our heads that we deserve to be happy, healthy, and prosperous. It would seem that many of us, consciously or unconsciously, believe that before we incarnated into this developmental process, we signed some sort of contract with our maker stipulating that we would be willing to endure a certain degree of fear, stress, and insecurity as long as sooner or later we got to be happy. And the wealthier and more privileged we are, the greater, it seems, is this expectation.

After more than two decades of working intensively with men and women who claim to want to transform and develop spiritually, I’ve come to the conclusion that one of the reasons it is so challenging for us to attain and sustain higher levels of spiritual development is that we expect so much and are willing to give so little in order to get what we think we want. The truth is, it’s hard to be happy. These days, it’s become almost a truism that simply fulfilling our narcissistic and materialistic desires will not necessarily make us truly happy. But how many of us have really dug deeply enough to reconfigure our own ideas of what happiness means in light of a higher set of values than those held by our crazy culture? For our values to change in a way that is nothing less than dramatic, we have to be willing to make a hell of a lot of effort. More and more of us are turning to the spiritual dimension of life. But it is telling that many of the most popular expressions of postmodern spirituality are based on a philosophical perspective that encourages us to pursue the promise of effortless peace, happiness, and release rather than an engagement with the life process that would always require more from us.

Why, for the luckiest people who have ever been born, should happiness be a birthright? Why should our spiritual aspirations be focused on the pursuit of inner peace alone? Did God create the universe so that you and I, at the beginning of the twenty-first century, could be happy? Is that really all there is to this fourteen-billion-year process? And why is it that so many of us presume that we deserve to be happy in the first place? What is it that we have actually done to give us such an innate privilege?

It’s fascinating to observe what happens to our perspective when we don’t assume that we necessarily deserve anything, especially not the promise of happiness or perfect peace. Just give it a try. You may be surprised to discover that a whole universe of previously unimaginable possibilities opens up to you. You may even begin to awaken to the overwhelming revelation that the very process that gave birth to your own capacity for life and consciousness urgently needs your willingness to make effort and even, I dare say, suffer, for its higher development.

I’m convinced that this evolving Kosmos is in desperate need of our conscious participation in order for its creative potential to continue to develop. Our postmodern spiritual pursuit of peace may in fact just be taking us out of the game. As our spiritual values evolve, if we reach high enough, we may come upon a surprising revelation: that in order to experience a happiness that is profound, we must be willing to struggle to find nothing less than a Kosmic sense of care for the life process that will set us free but, ironically, will never leave us in peace. -Andrew Cohen/EnlightenNext

How Much Do You Want to Change?

There are many places in which one can seek assistance to change, once you have made a commitment to yourself to make that change. No-one could help very much in the earlier stages of the process of change; that of making up your mind. Only you can make your decisions; no-one else can make your decisions for you, although it is often tempting to imagine that they could.

You often hear people say that another person controls them, and this may very well be the case, but they are only being controlled because they allow themselves to be controlled in this way. They have decided to let someone else control them, for whatever reason. They have chosen, either consciously or subconsciously, to give their own power to somebody else.

Human beings can give their power to someone else for a variety of reasons. It is frequently the case that one will seek another's assistance when trying to make a difficult decision. They simply do not want to have to make that decision themselves. A wise assistant will not be drawn into the trap of attempting to make that decision for you. Rather, they will ask questions to help you to explore your own feelings more fully and will try to help you to see every opportunity available to you.

Everyone knows of someone who got drawn into an argument between a couple and was later accused of taking sides. Similarly we all know of someone who did take sides when a couple split up, only to be persona non gratis when they got back together again. The fact is that even if you meant well when trying to help someone else to make a decision, they could very well end up blaming you for their decision. They do not set out with that intention, but it is a likely conclusion.

It can be very tempting as well to help someone to do something. To lend a helping hand makes you feel good. But there are many times when to help in this way does not help the other person in the long term. Every parent experiences this conundrum as they have to bite their tongue, step back and allow their children to learn through making their own mistakes. You cannot make someone else do something; you cannot make someone else succeed.

More often than not the best help you can give someone is to let them decide if they want to succeed or if they want to change. It can be hard to take that step back, to not lend that helping hand, particularly when you are being asked for help, and more so if it is a person whom you care for dearly. What you can do is ask questions designed to get that person to see things from every angle and therefore help them get into a position whereby they can make an informed choice about what they want to do. Another thing which you can do is to do what you can to help build that persons confidence and self belief as this is providing a solid foundation upon which to make good choices.

Every hypnotherapist will tell you that a large number of their clients knock upon their door in the hope that you can make their decisions for them or make their changes for them. A hypnotherapist, or any other therapist for that matter, cannot do this, and would not attempt to do so. Rather, your hypnotherapist will help you to think about things in a more positive way and ultimately feel that you can do whatever it is that you want to do.

A hypnotherapist can help you to relax and to access the sometimes hidden powers of our subconscious mind. When in hypnosis you have access to your subconscious mind, and this state of mind is naturally conducive to conflict resolution. Bear in mind, if you think you want to do something, but haven't yet gotten around to doing it, this is a clear indication of some type of conflict. Your subconscious mind is also the more creative part of your mind and so you can more easily see different options and more vividly imagine different outcomes.

Hypnosis is very helpful indeed when you are in the process of considering change. You can even learn to use hypnosis at home with the help of a hypnosis download. It is easy and completely natural.

It is always worth bearing in mind that what somebody does speaks more loudly than what somebody says. To make a decision and take no accompanying action merely points to the fact that there was really no decision made at all. A true decision is always accompanied by appropriate action. -Roseanna Leaton, specialist in hypnosis mp3s for change and well-being

The Importance of Women's Friendships

The special bond found in female friendships has proven to have tremendous benefits, psychologically, physically, and spiritually. Now is the perfect time to reinforce and celebrate those relationships. Sunday, September 19th is the 10th National Women's Friendship Day. This celebration has been endorsed by the governors of thirty-four states, and has become so popular that now the entire month of September has been declared the National Women's Friendship Month!

Why are women's friendships so important that they warrant national recognition? In recent years, research has shown that friendships between women have a wide range of health benefits that have widespread socio-economic repercussions. Through their friendships women build nurturing, emotionally-fulfilling bonds that serve as highly effective support systems. Within these relationships, women gain self esteem and validation. They find support in times of trouble and safe avenues for expressing their feelings and thoughts. A circle of women creates a sacred space that allows each to be more deeply present and proactive in their lives. In general, women with close female friends experience greater happiness and fulfillment.

These emotional benefits have direct physiological effects. A landmark UCLA study found that in times of stress, when men normally respond with a "fight or flight" reflex, women have an additional choice in their behavioral repertoire, to "tend and befriend." They pull together to support and nurture one another. This behavior releases extra oxytocin, a chemical that counters stress and produces a calming effect. Women connecting with women can actually assist in lowering blood pressure, heart rate, and cholesterol. A Harvard Medical School Nurse's Health Study further shows that because stress also wreaks havoc on blood glucose levels, healing, bone density and the aging process, women's friendships can help counteract all these detrimental effects of stress as well. Conversely, researchers also concluded that NOT having close friends is as detrimental to your health as smoking or carrying extra weight.

Other studies suggest that an older woman's risk of dying from heart disease may be linked to the number of family and social relationships she has. In one study among 503 women with symptoms of coronary artery disease, those with few personal contacts were more than twice as likely to die over the next two to four years as women with more social ties. When the researchers also looked at how women coped with widowhood, they found that those who had a close confidante were more likely to survive the experience without suffering new and lasting physical ailments or permanent loss of vitality. Finally, science is confirming what we knew all along! Our girlfriends are essential to our well being, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. So, take the time during this National Women's Friendship Month to acknowledge and enhance all your wonderful friendships. There are all sorts of ways to celebrate. You can reconnect with a friend over lunch or plan a girl's night out or even a weekend getaway. You can take part in a women's health fair, or a seminar on an issue important to women, or organize a clothing drive for needy women. You can expand your circle of women friends by going on a women's retreat or join a women's group like The Transitions Network which is a national organization for women over fifty. Look in you local papers to see what special activities are going on to commemorate this month. Commit to doing something to strengthen these important relationships. Embrace your sisterhood! -Copyright (c) 2009 Karin Marcus

The Power of Letting Go

In today’s crazy world, many of us are being forced to let go of the things in our lives that provide us with comfort and stability. When people lose their jobs due to company layoffs, they need to let go of their sense of security. When they can no longer pay their mortgages, they need to let go of the comfort and safety their homes provide. It can be overwhelming and extremely stressful. However, no matter what the circumstances, we must learn to go on. We need to let go of the past and find a way to move forward in our lives; no matter how difficult the circumstances may seem. Of course there is always a transition period when we have to change our lives in such a drastic way. It’s normal to question why certain things happen to us and take some time to reflect about the life we have been living up until this point.

However, instead of dwelling on the things we cannot change, I think we need to focus on the questions What now? and Where do we go from here? When we are in the process of losing things that are near and dear to us, our first instinct is that we want to cling to the past.

When people die and leave the earthly plane, they need to let go of their earthly possessions as well as their physical bodies. They, too, go through a period of transition while settling into their new surroundings. For those souls who want to cling to the life they had here on the physical plane, they become “earthbound spirits.” If you’ve ever seen the show “Ghost Whisperer,” these are the spirits who refuse to go “into the light” until whatever earthly issue they had is resolved. It’s not a good place to be for a spirit to be as it puts them in a sort of “limbo”. They know they can’t go back to their physical form and be with their loved ones, yet they don’t feel ready yet to start their new life on the other side.

When we insist on clinging to the past, we also become “earthbound spirits” keeping our lives in limbo. Knowing we can’t go back to the way things were but refusing to allow ourselves to move forward. We become stuck in our self created world.

When the rug feels like it’s being pulled out from under us, we need to learn to change our perspective on things and change our expectations. Ultimately, if we refuse to let go, we never give ourselves the chance to get to a new place where it could be even better for us! When we let go of things, it’s not that we don’t care about those things anymore, it’s just that our lives are different now and we need to re-prioritize the things that are important to us.

Sometimes, when we are forced to do things we don’t want to do, it ends up being a better situation for us. We find out that we are really stronger than we thought we were and that we’ve grown a lot by going through difficult times. When we create an environment that supports where we are right now, it’s easier to put the past in perspective.

When I was in my 20’s, I lost my dad to lung cancer. At the time, I didn’t think I would ever get over the loss. However, as I came into my skills as a Medium, I have been able to communicate with him in a different way. It’s not the same as having him here in his physical form but it’s certainly wonderful to have access to him while he’s happily living in another dimension. I needed to change my perspective of how I wanted things to be. Given the fact that having his human form here was no longer an option, I came to accept the fact that I could now have a different type of relationship with him which is still satisfying on many levels.

We will all experience hardships and loss in this lifetime. That’s just part of the human experience. However, it’s how we view these situations that can make them easier or harder for us. If you can look at the “so called” losses as openings to new beginnings, it will be easier to take the bull by the horns and create a new life path for yourself.

Remember, you don’t want to be stuck in “never never land” like an earthbound spirit. Find your inner strength , let go of the past, and open yourself up to looking at your life from a new perspective. There are endless possibilities out there that are awaiting you! -Jana Hollingsworth

Green Beans

This vegetables is one of favorite for me and my mom. It not just the flavor but green beans can reduce your high blood pressure(One week ago her blood pressure almost 170/100 but now 120/80).
If you have history of high blood pressure, green beans can be alternative for your medicine. here the recipe :

• Take 150gr green beans and wash
• Boil green beans with 2 glass water in stainless pot in 5 or 6 minutes
  
• Wait and second till the water in pot warn or cold
• Separate green beans from water(eat green beans as salad)
  
• Drink water boil green beans 2 times in a day

You do it until your have normal blood pressure(my mom need 3 days) and don't forget to always check your blood pressure. remember it just alternative cure you can believe it or not in your hands. -burifa

You Can Survive Postpartum Depression and Anxiety

Postpartum depression is very different from the "baby blues," a normal period of emotional fluctuation and tearfulness in the first few weeks following the birth of a child. However, for 10 percent (or more) of new moms, symptoms become worse over time and signficantly interfere with caring for themselves and their new babies.

Here are a few tips to remember when coping with postpartum adjustment issues:

*Feelings of anxiety, sadness, or detachment don’t make you mean, crazy, or a bad mother. Pregnancy and the postpartum period are a melting pot of new sensations, emotions, and situations. Even the most well-adjusted woman can experience intense, contradictory thoughts and feelings. These can be caused by the physical challenges of breast feeding, healing from labor and delivery, and the lack of sleep. Changes to your relationship with your family, friends, and partner can also leave a postpartum woman feeling isolated and alone.

*Postpartum Depression/Anxiety can strike anytime within the first year after the baby is born. Too often women who don't start to feel bad until months after the baby is born delay getting help because they believe (or may be mistakenly told) that postpartum mood disorders only occur immediately after the birth.

*Medications are only one option. There is no perfect solution in regard to taking medication while breastfeeding. Though most research indicates that it will not harm the baby, choosing to take meds while nursing is a highly personal decision. Women should know that starting medication to alleviate symptoms of anxiety and depression does not mean they must stay on that medication forever. When the symptoms have abated, you and your doctor can talk about a time table for weaning from the medication if that seems appropriate.

*Counseling can help provide information, support, and reassurance for woman and their families. Both individual and couples therapy can help pinpoint sources of anxiety and sort out solutions for a better future. Some counselors also provide group therapy for women with postpartum adjustment concerns. These groups can serve as a place to connect with others experiencing the same thing. However, most therapists will require an individual evaluation first to determine a woman's appropriateness for the group. -Holly Cox, LMFT

Tips on how to stop worry

Many of us are moving around everyday lost in out frightened thoughts of what could happen if this?, or that? etc.

It tends to isolate us in our little worlds of pain and we miss out on so much. Not to mention that nothing is more draining of our energy. We don't take opportunities that we should and we miss out on so much in life.

So how do we stop the process?

I hope some of the tips below will help.

1)If you are a worrier and it takes up alot of your time try this technique. Try exaggerating your worried thoughts without interupting them. What I mean by this is that If you have a thought that "My lover could leave me" instead of trying to re-assure yourself that he or she loves you and would never leave you try running with the idea that they could. Watch as your anxiety goes up reaches a plateau and then falls.

2)Forget alot of that positive thinking rubbish thats around Today. Don't try to replace you worried thoughts with more positive ones. Just let the thoughts be and watch them fade.

3)Ask yourself this -What emotion am I feeling when I worry? or what am I trying to avoid in my life?. Generally we worry about the things that we would like to avoid in life and its usually an emotion rather than a particular event. Thats why worries move from one thought to another until we finally face and accept the emotion we're avoiding.

4)Realise that surrender is your only option or that "resistance is futile" as the Borg would say. When an emotion comes up fueling a thought its no use trying to rationalise it away. Just let it happen and you will start to gain more control. -John Right(http://www.nopanic.cjb.net)

Different Types of Psychotherapy

I would like to start off by stating exactly what psychotherapy means as some people often have the wrong idea about it. A psychotherapist is the medical professional which offers this forum of treatment to patients through talking and thereby allowing them to deal with their psychic issues.

Psychodynamic therapy

This technique doesn’t rely on focusing on the various symptoms which are involved. What it does handle with are the different expressive issues at hand. It also looks at the intense reminiscences of relationships which are often the cause for the problems.

Many patients cannot clearly see this for themselves which is why this type of therapy can often help the people a great deal in understanding the root of their difficulties.
Please note however that this type of treatment is not applicable to all type of disorders which could include for example various phobias and obsessive disorders. Other types of assistance are available for people suffering from these types of issues.

Group therapy

One of the most popular and widely available types of therapies available now a day is group therapy. Individuals are able to talk about their situation and experiences in a group setting.

This can often be of great help and these individuals will quickly realize that they are not the only ones who are having these difficulties.

Behavioral therapy

This type of treatment is frequently used for people suffering from eating disorders. The person will receive assistance and information on activities which can be done rather than eating.

Family therapy

The entire family of a patient will be involved and they will be given information and assistance on how to deal with a family member who has mental disorders.

Gestalt therapy

This is based around the technique of allowing individuals the skill of discovering their authentic requirements and outlook in life.

Cognitive therapy

The person is taught to think about their situation realistically and it will allow them to view a situation from the correct perspective. -James Bukovsky

Release The Pressure

We are so intense about our relationships that it sometimes feels like we’re in a pressure cooker! Here are a few suggestions to release the pressure, remember what is real and enjoy your relationships more.

• Have more fun. Go for a drive. Take a walk or a hike. Cook a meal together. Watch something silly on television. Read the same book and discuss it. Take 30 minutes out of your day to talk, laugh and just enjoy being together.

• Take a class. Better yet, take two classes… you choose one and your partner chooses another. This will expose you to something new and you’ll know a little more about each other by learning about one another’s interests.

• Lighten up. Don’t take things personally. Most of the time, it isn’t personal. We all have moods and issues which usually dictate how we react and respond at any given moment. Remember that it’s not always about you or how your partner feels about you.

• Talk. Ask your partner about their day, how they are, what they need, how they are feeling. If he or she doesn’t want to talk at the moment, honor their space. If something happened that upset or confused you, talk it out. Be open, non-judgmental and honest.

Information is energy in formation which allows for peace. If you don’t ask for clarity, you may stew about a situation and come up with all kinds of scenarios which may not even be true. This will add to your stress and create tension.

So have more fun, lighten up and talk. Enjoy your relationship and remember why you came together in the first place! -Julie Farha

Learning How to Deal With Your Anger - Anger Management Tips

Do you ever feel like hitting someone when you are angry? Do you often scream at your colleagues? Do fights at home usually turn ugly? Is being irritable your second nature? Do you often feel depressed and resentful towards life? If the answer is yes, you need to calm down and learn how to manage your anger.

Anger and its side effects

Getting angry once in a while is normal, but the emotion can turn toxic if it becomes a way of life. Jealousy, resentment, frustration are all forms of anger and each one of them has the potential to wreck havoc in our lives. It's a well known fact that prolonged anger causes severe physical and mental problems-blood pressure, insomnia, anxiety, depression and even heart attacks, yet we seem to forget it every time we fly off into a rage. Anger is an emotion that arises in us because of certain external factors, it could be a traffic jam, someone's inefficiency or lack of understanding, yet we forget that by getting angry we are not punishing the subject of our anger but harming ourselves. If we think logically, why would we want to punish ourselves for something we haven't done? Unfortunately logic and rationality are first victims of uncontrolled anger.

How to Deal with Anger

If you have reached the realization that anger management is an issue you need to deal with, the following tips might be of help:

• Find a pillow and hit it for as long as you want. This will help you let out some steam. Once you are a little calmer, remember how being angry affects you and how the only person you are harming with this anger is yourself. With time you'll observe that following this routine will help you control your anger.
• Sit by yourself, take a deep breath and then exhale loudly. Do it repeatedly and tell yourself that you are exhaling your anger. It can have a calming affect on you, if you do it persistently.
• Try listening to subliminal message soundtrack- Buy an audio CD or download a soundtrack containing subliminal messages. These soundtracks come with audio messages that have been manipulated so that they are beyond the perception of your conscious mind but have the power to influence the subconscious. They could be embedded in music or could be played in reverse (mixed with music). Often, subliminal messages are moved above the level of human hearing (above 20,000 Hz). People who believe in their power claim that listening to soundtracks embedded with subliminal messages repeatedly can actually reprogram your mind to control sudden bursts of anger and can also help you stay calmer in general.
  

Finally, always remember that only person you harm by getting angry is yourself. So give yourself the gift of a happy and healthy life by learning how to manage your anger. -Dan Bainbridge

Ways to Fight a Depression

Obviously your doctor can assist you in helping you beat your depression however there are things which you do have control over and which you can change so as to improve your situation.

People who are suffering from depressions should definitely have a look at some of the tips which are listed in this health related article.

Stress

It is of the upmost importance that you seek for ways to lower your risk. Please note that not only a work environment can lead to a lot of stress but also certain family circumstances.

Medication

If you have been prescribed medication by your doctor then please be sure to take it. Is for whatever reason you no longer want to take medicine then be sure to consult your doctor first as this could have severe consequences. Please note also that you should never stop suddenly as you should stop taking your medication gradually. If you easily forget things then perhaps making a schedule when exactly you need to take your medication can come in very useful.

Positive Outlook

Many people who suffer from depression will often have a negative outlook on life and will often feel that there is no way out and that there is no way for things to get any better. This can be very dangerous so you should always look at things from a positive angle.

Continuing your Treatment

There is no quick fix for getting you over your condition which is why it is of the upmost importance that you stick through whatever treatment you are following. Results will come however it could take weeks or even months before you notice the difference.

Honesty

One of the best ways to help yourself is about being honest about your feelings and your situation. This can help health care professionals and therapists diagnose your precise problems and will allow them to give you suitable treatment. -James Bukovsky

Effects of Depression

Depression can be devastating to all areas of persons' everyday life. It isn't just a personal agony; its effects touch every segment of society and our economy if it is not recognized and treated. If left untreated, symptoms can last for weeks, months, or even years, causing needless pain and suffering, not only to the person who is depressed, but also to those who care about them.

Left untreated, depression will impact society as well as individuals. It leads to broken marriages, unemployment, hunger and homelessness. In work, depressed individuals are liable to be slow and less productive, to be indecisive and uncertain, and to make more mistakes. At home, depressed persons will lack interest in their family and will be unable to enjoy their company and shared activities, and to participate in family life. They will be unable to demonstrate affection for loved ones and uninterested in love-making. They will tend to avoid friends and social gatherings, and be unable to derive satisfaction from hobbies and leisure interests. Depression will not only hurt the depressed persons, but also their family and friends.

People who are depressed tend to view the world in an excessively pessimistic or hopeless light. There is no expectation that things will improve and often this dismal state of affairs is perceived as being their own responsibility. This pessimistic view is harmful for their future and the entire society.

We also can see many physical effects of depression. When an individual develops this condition the body will display the effects in various ways.

The vast majority of people who have depression suffer headaches. Frequent and constant headaches make depression much harder to deal with, because the depressive will already be trying to cope with various other symptoms.

Depression is commonly accompanied by sleep problems. Sufferers may find that they begin to sleep excessively, or they may not be able to get sufficient sleep. Without proper sleep pattern, they will feel constant tiredness and this can add to the negative emotions that they are already feeling. More important, during deep sleep, the bodies' immune system is under repair. Lack of deep sleep is common amongst depression sufferers. Without this time to repair, our immune system is weakened, making us more susceptible to disease.

Another common physical effect of depression is feeling of fatigue. This symptom can make depression worse because the constant tiredness can make a person feel negative and downbeat. -sunshine

Why Do People Get Depressed

Depression is an extremely complex disease. There is no single cause for depression. There are many different factors that can trigger depression.

Depression runs in family. If you have a family history of depression, you are more likely to get depression yourself. But not everyone who has the genetic makeup for depression gets depressed, it depends. Many people with no family history of depression can become depressed. So genes are not the single cause of depression.

Those who suffer a serious illness and experience a stressful life event tend to feel depressed. Difficult life events, such as parents divorce, separate, and death can lead to depression. Some people may become depressed for events like moving or changing schools.

Not getting along well with the friends, colleagues and partners may cause depression. If a person's relationship with their partner breaks down, they are likely to feel low, to stop seeing friends and family, and to start drinking more, all of which can make them feel even worse, and trigger depression. Personality traits such as introversion, low self-esteem, pessimism, and dependence contribute to depression. Those who have low self-esteem and a negative outlook are at higher risk of becoming depressed. People who feel that they have no control over negative events are very likely to become depressed. For some teens, a negative, stressful, or unhappy family atmosphere can affect their self-esteem and lead to depression.

Loneliness and isolation can trigger depression. Depression rates are higher among people who live alone and have a limited social network. But even people surrounded by family and friends are at risk for depression if those relationships are un-supportive.

Depression may be caused by serious medical conditions. Medical conditions can bring the physical weakness and stress, which are likely to lead to depression. Moreover, depression can make medical conditions worse, since it weakens the immune system and can make pain harder to bear.

Whatever its cause, depression is not just a state of mind. It is related to physical changes in the brain, and connected to an imbalance of a type of chemical that carries signals in your brain and nerves. To keep fit, you should avoid depression as possible as you can. -sunshine

Signs of Depression

Depressions are often left untreated as people who suffer from it might not be aware of their condition or perhaps no one has clearly looked at the symptoms.

It can be very dangerous to leave it unattended to which is why I have listed some of the most common signs of depressions so that loved ones and friends can perhaps help a friend or family member who is suffering from it. Please note that it can lead to suicide so please be sure to assist anyone who suffers from it.

• The person is continuously miserable and is often very nervous and restless.

• There are also various sleeping disorders which can be involved with depression and they include people sleeping too much or perhaps not sleeping at all due to insomnia. A person who suffers from is frequently also awake very early in the morning.

• Another clear sign is that an individual will often have little or no energy and will seem to be tired throughout the day.

• A very common symptom is also that a patient is often very pessimistic about all aspects of their life and that they cannot envision a bright or normal life in the future.

• Many depressed people will also think about committing suicide and many will have attempted it already at some stage.

• What you will also find is that a person will often get irritated rather quickly.

• A major issue among people who suffer from depressions is the fact that they will have problems taking decisions, being able to focus and being able to remember even the smallest of details.

• What can often also be seen is that individuals will either eat very little or they will actually eat too much.

-James Bukovsky

Building Confidence - Talent

It may not always be apparent, but a lack of confidence has a very profound effect on your daily life. Lots of people do not even realize that there is a need to build more self-confidence within themselves. Nearly every situation in your life has something to do with self-esteem/confidence in some way or another. You will need faith in yourself and your abilities when meeting new people, starting new hobbies, or getting a promotion. It may seem that you lack certain skills and that you feel unqualified to do certain things, and you are correct. A lack of skill is related to a lack of confidence, but more importantly, this can be seen in the vice versa.

Here is an example of someone who rarely goes out. He can be outgoing and jubilant with his close friends, but never in public. He is usually seen as quiet and introverted, and hardly ever makes eye-contact. There could be a number of reasons for why he is like this. Maybe he was scolded when he talked to strange folks as a child. Perhaps he had an altercation and was humiliated in school. Maybe he did not grow up with the finest of amenities, and was laughed at about his "choice" of clothing. Whatever the cause, the end result is that he doesn't like to go out much, and it's probably because he lacks confidence in himself.

This fellow can and will make himself confident in many ways. He could be a prolific artist. When others see his work, they may be amazed at the size of his portfolio. It would seem that he could make a decent living from his work.

But there is an inherent problem: No one ever sees his work.

His friends are baffled as to why he does not go public with his work. It's obvious he loves doing it, why doesn't he create a huge portfolio and submit it to a gallery or something?

That's a problem many of us have. You can have all of this potential in the world and it wouldn't mean anything if you are unable to act upon it because of your fear of the unknown. What is there to be frightened of? Normal people do not understand the dilemma faced by people with low self-esteem. They can't see the crippling effect of a lack of self confidence, and don't realize that as the sufferer is further crippled, he could spiral into depression, drug use and crime.

What is the fear? It is fear of humiliation, fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of meeting new people, even fear of success. This person has been predisposed in someway to thing that anything he does is never good enough. He was not taught to fight for what he believed in, and to take loss as a lesson to learn.

Defeating this disposition is no easy task. A person has to constantly remind his or herself that the thoughts that pop into their brain automatically are irrational, and usually untrue. It takes a lot of time to start to chisel away at the rigidity of the mind and start to see results. For the duration of this therapy, the person in question must be constantly reminded that only through persistence and patient can the mind be changed. Small wins turn into big wins, and the sufferer will eventually begin to understand that it is possible to give up the negative thoughts and build more confidence. -Rocky Moses

5 Good Reasons to Tell & Share Your Life Story

1. Each day of life is truly a gift. It is important to seize the day to write at least a heartfelt letter, or preferably, a more complete life story while you have the chance. Your beliefs, values, and experiences will be invaluable to to present and future generations. This needs to be done whether you are 30, 40, 50, 60, 70, 80, or 90+.

2. You do have something to say and you can say it. Keep it mind that you don’t have to write like your old high school English teacher or Shakespeare to say what you want to say. Short, direct sentences are just fine. Remember the details from the events of your life. Recall what you saw, heard, smelled, tasted, or felt during that moment.

3. See the big picture and learn about you! You have accomplished many things during your time on earth. Life review through a tool like www.lifebio.com helps you recognize the joys and challenges you have experienced at different stages of life. You will gain a new “big picture” perspective on where you’ve come from and where you are going. You might learn some new things about yourself that could affect the way you live the rest of your life. You will also have the opportunity to share history from your own perspective.

4. Your children and grandchildren need (and want) your life story to preserve their legacies. Children (especially grown children) will gain strength from reading your life experiences and memories. They don’t just want your life stories recorded; they need them to be recorded. There is real wisdom that comes from your life experience.

Also, within your story is the story of the men and women that shaped your life. Within your story are your memories of your parents, grandparents, aunts, and uncles. Without your recollections of these important people, the next generations will never know them. That would be a shame.

5. Your life story will share your love. Recording memories is a lasting way to ensure future generations know what was truly important to you. Tell them that you love them—on paper so it will be there for them for years to come. Tell them your hopes for their future. Tell them what you feel is truly important about your family’s beliefs. Tell them what must endure. Help them remember—from your own words. -Beth Sanders